Talking

So I wrote the last blog earlier today. And someone must have been listening somewhere. I got a FB tweet from my old friend RB whom, like all men in my life it seems, I used to like. But he decided to become a priest. I lost track of him while he was going to school and just recently found him on FB. So we have just started talking when M called. Strange night! Promised to talk to him soon.

I talked to M for about an hour. It's lovely and I love his voice and I miss his hugs and I miss him. But it just always feels sort of awkward, slightly forced. We're better together in person.

Usually it still felt a little awkward, but I always just chalked that up to me liking him. I don't know. I've know him since college and still didn't know his favorite color. It's blue. I asked tonight.

But I guess I just want to get deeper. I want to know about his childhood, his fears, his hopes. Some we get into a little. I don't know. I guess I'm afraid to ask some, because, well it just seems a little like these are questions you ask a boyfriend or something. I don't know how to explain it. Plus, I'm a talker and I don't think he is much. I mean, most men aren't. It's ok. I got to hear his voice. That's all that matters. He's going through his own struggles too, trying to decide whether or not to become a priest. TREND ALERT!

So we're both going through journeys. And it's been about a year since we've re-connected and I am forever grateful that given I told him I liked him, he said he didn't like me and then I basically didn't really have any contact with him for a year. So, you have to give him a ton of credit for still sticking with me and my craziness.  He said he's coming to MD in July on some retreat or mission trip, or something. Not too far from here. I really hope I get to see him.